The ability to say ‘no’ doesn't come easy to most of us. So here is some help. We get some real life situations where saying ‘no’ is inevitable.


“No, I’m not fit for this work”
This is a result of making the most of whatever resources one has in hand. Says Monica Sharma, who works with a real estate company, "I am a finance professional. But I was pushed into marketing. It was ridiculous, as I wasn't skilled for the job."

Way out: Reason out with your boss or management, and explain why you are 'not the right person for this'. As Priya Kumar, CEO and Chief Facilitator, International Center for Training Systems, points out, "In a situation like this, honesty plays a key role. You could say 'I don't think I would do justice to this work as I am not skilled for it'. Or, 'I believe that someone else can do a much better job on this.' You can also say that 'Handling project A isn't one of my biggest strengths. But if you insist, I will do it. However, I may not be able to deliver the best on this'."

“No, I don’t want to go out with you”
Some friends, who pile on, can be a real pain. Not only do they invade your personal space, but also make you do things that you wouldn't want to. As Pratik Mukherjee, a marketing manager with a reputed media company says, "I have got stuck watching a movie, or having dinner, that I hated, just because my friend wanted to. But sometimes refusing overbearing friends becomes really difficult."

Way out: Pushy friends, who drag you to socialise, leave you with very few options. Says Pratik, "When I absolutely don't want to meet 'that' somebody, I come up with an excuse, because that is the only way out." But what happens after the excuses run dry? "Well, then I subject them to the movie or dinner that I have in mind," laughs Pratik. Standing your own does help driving the point home to such bossy buddies, he adds.


“No, I can’t always get it right”
For ten jobs that you take on, in most probability, eight will be successful and two open to errors. As Nitin Prasad (name changed), working as an account manager with a reputed advertisement agency, says, "I was on a spree of cracking deals with my clients. When one of my deals didn't work out, the management didn't want to hear that the deal had failed."

Way out: When on the success route, don't forget about failures. This doesn't mean that you are courting a crash; it only indicates that deals may take a reverse turn. Keep your superiors posted on your progress, and ask for strategies or plans of action in case of roadblocks. Let them know that, "I am committed to my project. But, at the same time, I would appreciate your feedback to increase my chances of success." It is easier to handle or prevent failure when more minds are on the job, suggests Priya Kumar.

“No, I don’t want unwanted guests”
Dodging unwanted guests is a task. Sagnik Basu, an IT professional, agrees, "A particular work colleague would land up at my home, uninvited. I hated this, but I would be left with no options, but to entertain him."

Way out: In situations like these, excuses cease to exist. So one has to either grit their teeth and accept, or pucker up the courage to refuse unwanted company. "When I couldn't tolerate it anymore, I would head out of home each time he dropped in. Finally, his visits came to a stop," offers Sagnik.

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